I may be stubborn and unchanging and one-track-minded but if there’s anything I’ve learned to never do in the last few years, it’s pose an absolute. For example:
“I will never date a military guy.”
A few years ago, I dated a guy in the Army for two years.
“I am not staying on this island after I graduate.”
I’ve been here since.
“I never want a cat.”
I almost couldn’t say goodbye to Cameow when I had to give him away.
“I am not doing that ever again.”
Oops, I did it again.
I’ve come to believe that the second you say that something is definitely or is definitely not going to happen, God sits you back down and tells you that you have no idea what you want. It’s a nice little reminder to open your mind and heart to everything around you. A reminder to forgive and forget and to stop trying to control every aspect of your life because it’s not going to happen. For a control freak like me, that’s near impossible. I drive myself insane trying to grasp any kind of control I can have over my life, which often times leads to me spiraling completely out of control. Ironic.
There’s nothing wrong with a little detailed planning here and there or goals (I don’t like wandering around aimlessly) but a little too much takes you out of perspective — you forget the bigger picture and sometimes, what you’d been trying to do in the first place.
So if there’s anything I never condone it’s to never pose an absolute. Wishes for the future and pretty plans of what you would like to happen? Sure. But never an absolute.
I must have a disclaimer though: I’m not telling you things can or can’t happen — a little determination can go a long way and sometimes you don’t realize you got what you wanted. And I’m definitely not telling you to be reckless. please. All I’m saying is that there’s a huge chance that you probably don’t want or understand what you think you do, and I think that’s okay.
We’re just wandering souls seeking fulfillment — be it a continuous stream of temporary ones or a couple of eternals. But while you seek out such fulfillment, just keep that mind wide open — you might just change your mind later…or something might force you to.